Spontaneous Dramas, Fertile Ground, and Unexpended Energy.

I know it sounds like that's a crazy vast range of topics...but it isn't really. It all connects to how i'm feeling at this moment.

I'm working on our school's Centennial play right now. It's a new play, and we actually got to spend a week with the writer at our disposal. She's great, her name is Debbie Harbin, and she's a Messiah Alum. Our director is Jim Knipple and he's pretty freakin' fantastic. He says the most ridiculous things and has us do crazy activities that force us into our "yellow zone, maybe pushing up against the wall of the red zone." (He's talking about comfort zones, of course.) Oh, yeah, the cast is all girls. And we wouldn't have it any other way :-D

FOR EXAMPLE: Tonight at the beginning of rehearsal he asked us if we were feeling sorta brave or really brave. We all agreed that we were feeling really brave. Little did we know... he gave us a rubric for creating a drama. A huge list of things. But he didn't tell us where we would be performing this. So we have it, and then he says, "okay, let's take a walk." And then there was terror... on all of our faces. It was so scary. We leave Climenhaga, and then reality set in. We were going to be performing in public. So I got mad nervous; which, by the way isn't normal for me. I mean, I get nervous, but not to the point where I was saying "I'm gonna barf." We kept walking and it just kept getting worse and worse. So we end up at the newly constructed "Presidential Tree Circle" and I'm not even sure if that's it's real name...that's what I call it.
Anyway, we're all like....freaking out. So we start planning and while we're doing that our Assitant Director, Stage Manager and Assistant Stage Manager went to recruit people to watch. Which we all caught onto very quickly. So, we had a space, and an audience...now we needed a show. That was easy. We already had it figured out. We just had to do it...so we did. And it was CRAZY! One of the specs was to have 15 seconds of loud talking. So that was fun...and it turned in to screaming. Which was.....slightly...........a little more louder than "loud." And it was fun.
After it was all done, we talked about it and we all agreed that, while it was somewhat uncomfortable, we started to follow our impulses and it turned out to be excellent.
So we went back to the theatre and did more ridiculous things. But it was fun, once we got out of our heads. That's such a hang-up, but we're working on it.

So, the show is called "Fertile Ground: Stories from Messiah College's first 100 Years", and it's going to be fantastic. There are three awesome, and amazing story lines, and that's all I'm allowed to say. You just have to come see it.

So after rehearsal, I came back to the apartment, and had some ice cream and finished last night's Gossip Girl episode. (By the way--it's going to be a fantastic season.) I was really excited about what transpired at rehearsal, and wanted to talk about it, but I felt like I couldn't. I don't know why. It just felt like my excitement was squashed the second I walked in the room. So I just sat silently, watched GG, ate the best ice cream in the world (chocolate pretzel), and then once GG was over I started blaring music in my headphones. And I've been sitting this way for 2 hours and 30 minutes...roughly. I guess I can't share an experience like that with people who won't understand it...maybe that's just part of being an artist. But if I keep this terrible feeling inside I'm going to be very upset for a really long time, and I won't know what to do with it. And it's one of those upset things that I can't cry...I hate those. I want/need to cry...but I can't. So I'm listening to Coldplay instead.

Anyway, man, all I've done is whine. Not really. Oh. and...there is something interesting in my life that we shall see where it goes...I always have a tendency to jump the gun, so this time, I'm going to really try not to :-) Which is quite the challenge for me. So I'll keep you posted on that.

Until then, Peace, Love and Stars
--Star G.